Young Marriage.
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Assalamualaikum wbt.
Again, this topic. I saw this everywhere these days. Be it on Facebook, on Instagram, on Twitter. There are mixed messages sent by numerous amount of people. Be it bashing, supporting or from their own experiences.
Some say that marriage avoids so many things rather than just zinah. It covers your eyes, your heart, your aurah, your speech, everything. I couldn't agree more.
Some say how on earth are you going to get married ? What will happen if your wife is pregnant ? You are young, jobless/still studying, how are you going to feed her ? Your child ? Are you still going to latch on to your parents ? They have done so much for you and still you want to ask for more ? I couldn't help but agree to this as well.
Some say parents declined their children's desire to get married young because they see things we don't know. They brought us up, they know how capable we are if we are to get married. I agree to this too.
Speaking from my own experience, after marriage I am turning into someone sane. I began to see how much my parents sacrifices for me. I love them even more now. I was young back then, but I get married young as well. 22. Who get married at 22 ? Seriously, who does ? Will you get marry if you know your soon-to-be husband is jobless, still studying, assuming he will finish his study, would you in the right mind marry him ? Given by what the world is offering us these days, luxury in various forms - shoes, bags, gadgets, travel, are you sure your husband is going to give you all that if you married young ? You think, decide what you want & reflect. If you still wanted all those things, no you are not ready to get married.
In terms of income, Allah SWT is always around. There are always rizq in places you would not expect. Alhamdulillah, I don't know how many times I mentioned this, but I never went a day without food after marriage. Alhamdulillah for many other things that has been happening to me. See, the thing is, marriage open thousand doors of sustenance. It could be wealth, health, baby, family, education, anything. You just have to believe in Allah SWT. Believe in Him as birds flee their home in the morning on empty stomach and return with full ones. Alhamdulillah, I'm in the UK, I do not ask for a single penny from my parents or my parents in law. Alhamdulillah, He helped me a lot. Maybe there is a reason why we are not yet blessed with a child. Allah SWT knows. He know what ever is happening and going to happen. He blessed us with other things. I'm not even sad or mad, I'm blessed. Even though loads of my friends whom just got married last year or this year are having babies, I'm happy for them.
Allah SWT promised us He will bless us with unlimited sustenance if you commit something in His name & He really does. Even if you use your parents' money after marriage, Allah SWT plan it so. He give you sustenance He promised through your parents. So you will appreciate & love them even more.
Allah SWT promised us He will bless us with unlimited sustenance if you commit something in His name & He really does. Even if you use your parents' money after marriage, Allah SWT plan it so. He give you sustenance He promised through your parents. So you will appreciate & love them even more.
So don't worry if you are thinking what will happen after marriage. Cause He will give a way. He'll give you opportunities to work part time maybe, or even give you a wonderful spouse that is content with whatever you have right now. You never know. Allah SWT work in a way our mind could not grasp.
Regarding your parents, yes they do see through you. If you portray a responsible character, they might let you. I have been and always been an independent girl. Both my parents said so. They know how well you will get on with your life, they will let you. If you are reckless, irresponsible, not paying attention, selfish, how would they think of you? They would be terrified to allow you for marriage. Cause you well know what happen inside a marriage. You would have to put other people on top of yourself. So, reflect yourself & rethink your parents' decision. It's for your best.
There are pros & cons of getting married young. But it depends on your level of maturity how to handle it. Young marriage is not easy, but maturity does not come with older age. The most confident thing you could do is tawakkal to Allah SWT and intensify your doa. He will help you InsyaAllah.
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